Hello! Thank you for taking the first step! My name is Makeda Bostwick, a Licensed Professional Counselor in Pennsylvania and Georgia. I bring over 10 years of clinical experience to the field of mental health.
My clinical experience has allowed me to work with individuals, couples, groups, and the youth populations on improving their manageability with stress/anxiety, depression, self-confidence, adjusting to life’s challenges, trauma, and relationship satisfaction.
Each of us brings our own history, traumas, fears and points of view into our adult relationships. Our past experiences continue to drive our view of self, others, and the world. We carry forward unhelpful ways of communicating, behaving, and relating to others. Often times, we are unaware of how we communicate our needs because sometimes, we aren't even aware of our needs resulting in self-sabotaging thoughts/behaviors and in turn, contributes to our relationship dissatisfaction.
The biggest challenge, however, is your own resistance. You naturally want to protect yourself from pain, so you try to ignore the past and distract yourself from the inner negativity. If negative states linger in spite of your efforts, something else is required in order to heal.
My goal is to walk with you, not ahead of you on your journey to healing and self-discovery.
Specializing in Anxiety, Depression and Relationship Therapy
~ A Messy Home Environment
~ Self Neglect
~ Not Enough Sleep
~ Social Gatherings
~ Work Environment
~ Feeling Critical of Oneself
~ Overwhelming Sadness
~ Low Self Esteem
~ Poor Self Image
~ Fatigue and Decreased Energy
~ Irritability and Restlessness
~ Withdrawing from once-pleasurable activities
Low Self Confidence
~ expectations from parents and caregivers as a child
~ peer pressure from friends or loved ones
~ relationships, including breakups or divorce
~ unresolved trauma
~ internalized shame
~ certain mental health conditions
~ brain functioning and development
~ other societal and cultural messages
~ Toxic communication- Instead of treating each other with kindness, most of your conversations are filled with sarcasm, criticism, or overt hostility. You may even start avoiding talking to each other.
~ Controlling behaviors- Questioning where you are all the time or becoming overly upset when you don’t immediately answer texts are both signs of controlling behavior, which can contribute to toxicity in a relationship.
~ Patterns of disrespect- Being chronically late, casually “forgetting” events, and other behaviors that show disrespect for your time are a red flag.
~ Ignoring your needs- Going along with whatever your partner wants to do, even when it goes against your wishes or comfort level, is a sure sign of toxicity.
~ Lost relationships- You’ve stopped spending time with friends and family, either to avoid conflict with your partner or to get around having to explain what’s happening in your relationship.
~ Lack of self-care- In a toxic relationship, you might let go of your usual self-care habits. You might withdraw from hobbies you once loved, neglect your health, and sacrifice your free time.
~ Hoping for change- You might stay in the relationship because you see the other person’s potential or think that if you just change yourself and your actions, they’ll change as well.
~ Walking on eggshells- You worry that by bringing up problems, you’ll provoke extreme tension, so you become conflict avoidant and keep any issues to yourself.
~ I can’t stop worrying.
~ I often worry about things I have no control over.
~ I constantly remind myself of mistakes.
~ I relive embarrassing moments in my mind over and over.
~ I often ask myself "what if..." questions.
~ I have difficulty sleeping because it feels like my brain won't shut off.
~ When I recall conversations with people, I can’t help but think about all the things I wish I had or hadn't
~ I spend a lot of free time thinking about the hidden meaning behind things people say or events that occur.
~ When someone says something or acts in a way I don't like, I dwell on it.
~ I spend so much time either dwelling on past events or worrying about the future that I often miss what’s going on in the present.
~ You pretend to agree with everyone.
~ You feel responsible for how other people feel.
~ You apologize often.
~ You can’t say no.
~ You feel uncomfortable if someone is angry at you.
~ You act like the people around you.
~ You need praise to feel good.
~ You go to great lengths to avoid conflict.
~ You don’t admit when your feelings are hurt.